In my mind, I can envision a dark and cold room. It’s cluttered – teeming with lottery scratch offs, cigarette butts, and old cans of vintage Coca-Cola. All dimly lit by a 23-inch CRT TV, blaring an old comedy show sandwiched between in-your-face advertisement after advertisement, product placement on top of product placement.

http://www.vaporwave.net/post/170790266304/that-comfy-vaporwave-aesthetic-and-feel-feel-the

For some reason, there's a warm nostalgic feeling I receive when looking at this sight, despite never growing up in an environment like it or even the decade such a hypothetical scene would be most commonly found in - the 80s and 90s. If you aren't nostalgic for a time such as this, I have no doubt there is something out there, whether it be an old piece of entertainment or an old car or even a city you once lived in, where that rush of dopamine hits you and your heart starts to tug and pull. You yearn to be back in that time period, that setting, living through that scenario.

http://www.dictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/post/105778238455/anemoia-n-nostalgia-for-a-time-youve-never

Anemoia. That’s the word I found after scouring the internet for a word that described such a feeling. Invented by writer John Koenig, anemoia is defined as nostalgia for a time you've never known. I’d say that pretty aptly describes that sense of wistful nostalgia I've felt ever since I was in my early teens.

While it makes sense to get old heartwarming tendencies when you look back at things that remind you of your past, I find myself at a loss as to why I get nostalgic about some of the things I do. Going back to my original scenario, such a scene can be found often associated with vaporwave music scattered throughout the internet, sourced from various pieces of media from back then.

As I said earlier I was barely alive in the 90's, and if the internet all the way up to the Y2K era was the deep web at its 1.0 state, I had jumped on at version 2.0. I really didn't get to experience the internet in all its glory until MySpace had hit its peak and dial-up had already phased itself out in my region of the world. I think it's safe to say that most fans of vaporwave and similar genres and mediums so centralized on the nostalgic factor are not from the era which these mediums attempt to represent. So why is it that I and so many others feel so happy, so calm, and filled with ecstasy when we're listening to “Resonance” by Home or watching old McDonald's commercials paired with Saint Pepsi's "Enjoy Yourself"? I believe there are a few different factors that could play into this.

http://www.fubiz.net/en/2016/05/07/aesthetic-vaporwave-digital-90s-inspired-creations/

First, I think it be key that we not forget where the word "nostalgia" originates from. The word comes from the Greek root word nostos - to return home - and the New Latin root algos - the painful thoughts induced from that. It's first known uses were in the 17th century when Swiss army men would get homesick after being sent out to war. Hold onto this thought for a second.

Now, in recent decades the word is much more positively attributed as researchers have found that usually these nostalgic triggers actually help to uplift one's mood in both new environments and states of depression. Say for instance you were held prisoner in a cold environment for months, if not years. If you used to be in a warmer environment before being placed there, you'd most likely harken back to the days you'd sit or stand at where you felt that warmth, uplifting your mood even by just a tiny bit. Don't believe me? This was actually researched by Dr. Tim Wildschut, as stated by The Guardian, who found that women who had survived the holocaust experienced that same exact scenario I described during their time in imprisonment.

Another example that is given is from researcher Constantine Sedikides, who found when he transferred from the University of North Carolina to the University of Southampton that he would frequently receive nostalgic feelings of his previous home. These didn't make him sad, however, they actually enhanced his mood.

To go along with this - Zhou Xinyue, a Chinese researcher at Sun Yat-sen University discovered in the late 2000s that nostalgic feelings were a natural way for the brain to counteract loneliness. In the study she conducted with over 700 Chinese children who migrated from various rural parts of China into the city of Guangzhou, undergraduates in Shanghai, and around 200 migrant workers at a factory in Dongguan. She would conduct surveys that measured a person's sense of loneliness and nostalgia. Zhou found that the lonelier someone felt, the more social they were. However, when they were lonelier, they held more nostalgic sentiments, which in turn improved their social connectedness.

http://www.fubiz.net/2016/05/07/aesthetic-vaporwave-digital-90s-inspired-creations/

So how does all this research relate to my original question? I believe it has to do with the three key takeaways that I found - migration, the internet age, and sadness. For those like myself who weren't around to experience the 90's, 80's, and so on, we are just now going through the start of our own journey. Whether that be starting college, buying our first home's, renting out our first apartments, traveling without older adult supervision, and so on. We are all beginning to migrate at this stage of our life in one aspect or another, creating new milestones for ourselves. Right now, is the prime time for our minds to start triggering these nostalgic feelings as we begin to gain a sense of homesickness and perhaps even loneliness. While our first nostalgic thoughts will likely be pointed towards our connections to our previous home, we're going to be more susceptible to nostalgia in various forms.

At the same time, we're also living in a decade where the world feels much closer than it's ever felt before. The internet has expanded and evolved greatly in the past 20 years, and now we're entrenched in a web culture that's shrouded with the "random", e.g. memes, viral videos, and so on. We're connected even more with those that did experience the 80s and the 90s as they were occurring, and in a sense those individuals can share that nostalgia because of the world wide web. It also means we are going to be marketed and advertised nostalgia as we are grouped into that same broad age range of millennials even if we don't necessarily hold the same experiences and memories as older people in our group.

Our group is also living in an era where suicide rates are increasing almost across the board in many countries. Depression feels even more prevalent now, and the daily barrage of negative news that surrounds us doesn't help. This could also be a trigger for us to contain more nostalgic emotions.

I feel that a mix of these various factors has led us to this anemoia, where we are perhaps feeling at one of our lower points in life and/or are transitioning to a new point in our life where we may be alone. Because of how inherently connected we are due to the internet, however, we're capable of getting to that same nostalgic state that we so desperately enjoy and crave through different experiences that aren't inherently our own. This in turn can help raise our mood and lead to more prosocial behaviors.

I feel very grateful that I was able to live during this period, where the web is this wide, expansive ocean. Where subcultures like vaporwave are able to exist and thrive and be capable of bringing others who share the same sentiments together. Here they're able to create new experiences together, revel in that sense of nostalgia, and who knows - maybe when people my age are in their late stages of life, they'll feel nostalgic for this "Unexperienced Nostalgia" we feel currently and engage in a "Meta-Nostalgia".

Or maybe I'm completely off base and we just really like the lo-fi aesthetic that comes from the late 80s to 90s. I'm honestly okay if it's just that too, because it means we still got to experience the greatness that is Macintosh Plus 420.